The Beholder's Other Eye

There's always hope

2006-09-29T16:46:00.000-07:00

Reuters today reports that Ayman al-Zawahri, Al Qaeda's appropriately numbered number-two man, called President Bush a "lying failure and charlatan" in regard to the war on terrorism.

(Does he really know what a charlatan is? Is there an Al-Qaeda-language equivalent so specific to "charlatan?" Or was this a bored translator abusing his poetic license?)

This is a breakthrough: The discovery that a high-level Al Qaeda leader and many Americans both agree on something. I suspect similar agreement could be reached on the social and moral worth of Jackass: Number Two, now in theatres too near you.

One hopes that we'd find other common ground and somehow be able to end this thing in time for the playoffs.

For Churchill Downs

2006-05-07T17:37:00.000-07:00

"Paige, why do you refer to condoms as derby hats?"
"Because when Bob puts one on he's saddling up for the fastest two minutes in bed."

Opposite extremes

2006-02-25T12:02:00.000-08:00

The American government established laws restricting euthenasia.

The Chinese government established laws restricting youth in Asia.

Effective earthquaking

2006-01-27T14:46:00.000-08:00

Today a magnitude 7.7 earthquake shook eastern Indonesia. The quake was centered 120 miles off the coast, some 212 miles deep.

While this might seem like a near disaster averted merely by nature's good will, it's actually the direct result of a business practice that has become quite common in recent years.

An anonymous Indonesian official reported, "After seeing the ravaging impact of various earthquakes throughout Asia in recent years, we realized that we could significantly reduce the economic and human costs of an earthquake if we simply offshored it."

Hamas adopts two state charter

2006-01-27T14:40:00.000-08:00

In perhaps the most gracious move since winning a resounding victory in recent Palestinian elections, the militant Hamas party has adopted their own version of the two-state charter adopted by their predecessors.

A senior Hamas official was quoted as saying, "We are fine with a two state solution. They'll just need a lot of snorkels."

Today's Headline

2005-12-21T10:37:00.000-08:00

Today's headline reads "Saddam Claims He's Been Beaten."

Well, he's been deposed as leader of Iraq, captured, photographed without a fresh shave and manicure, and is on trial. He's just now realizing he's been beaten?

Gratuitous sax and violins

2005-09-07T15:04:00.000-07:00

The world needs some oft-neglected musical forms to perform under that headline. Should get some attention, which needs to be done.

Mean it

2005-08-25T08:36:00.000-07:00

Saying 'I'm sorry' means nothing if it's just the right thing to say. Meaning you're sorry, being sorry, it showing in what you do or don't do, is what matters.

Saying 'thank you' means nothing if it's just the right thing to say. Meaning you're grateful, being grateful, it showing in what you do or don't do, is what matters.

Cartoon idea

2005-08-06T17:12:00.000-07:00

Someone needs to draw a cartoon of two "Hello, my name is..." stickers. They're looking at each other. One says to the other, "You had me at 'Hello'."

A new truism

2005-07-25T12:00:00.000-07:00

Someone I quite respect liked this when I blurted it out yesterday, so I thought I'd share.

It was regarding doing theatre, production values, and trying to get the most out of your people without killing them (no doubt true in life beyond theatre too):

I strongly believe in pushing the envelope, but don't rip it.

The Oys of Summer

2005-06-16T17:18:00.000-07:00

A couple of notables after witnessing the Mets' first ever regular season win in Oakland (this was their first ever visit to Oakland aside from the unmentionable 1973 World Series)...

a) You have to wonder about the guy who's selling icies in the first inning, slurpies in the fourth inning, and kool-aid near the end of the game. Does it go the other way for night games in October (or, in San Francisco, July)?

2) In the eighth inning, Yabu bounced a pitch about six feet in front of the plate (no Met would do that). Nevertheless, the radar gun said 81mph. Is that before or after the bounce? (Hey, the hot A's fan sitting in front of me laughed, so I don't care what you think.)

Deep Throat discovered?

2005-05-31T11:16:00.000-07:00

Today it's reported someone revealed himself as being the Deep Throat in the Watergate incident. No doubt, there will be much debate about his veracity, if he's just trying to get some latter day fame, whether he was also the second gunman on the grassy knoll, yadda yadda.

The headline I saw says "Deep Throat Comes Forward." My suggested headline, "Deep Throat Goes Down."

Alabama Idol

2005-05-27T12:05:00.000-07:00

I do not watch American Idol. I saw one last year where they did all Billy Joel songs. I sat with my best friend as she watched a couple this winter while visiting.

There have been four Idols. One winner (Ruben) and one runner-up (Bo) are from Alabama -- the Birmingham area, in fact.

Two of the top 8 Idols are from my hometown. Anyone else able to say that? Anyone?

Who cares? Check the ratings, people care. (Why, is another question... But people are into it, so let's give a shout out to my homeland.)

2 of 8. 25% from one city, out of 50 states. Remember that next time you're ready to make a joke about The South.

I'm just saying.

First occasional lyric citation

2005-05-19T07:49:00.000-07:00

From Joe Jackson's "Love Got Lost"
Album, "Night and Day 2"
(part of this blog's occasional homage to outstanding lyrics)

"Saturday night, went to see La Bohème
Used the spare ticket just for my coat
I guess I should swallow my pride
But I'd be damned if I hawked it outside
In the pouring rain
Monday morning, and no-one to blame
Keep hitting icebergs but I'm still afloat
I'd like a new body and face
But I'd settle for a friend with a space
On their calendar

Up to now, and hard to say
Wonder what I've found
But love got lost
Along the way"

TiVo and its Mental Impact

2005-05-11T19:35:00.000-07:00

I've had TiVo for over four months. Yes, it's hard to imagine life before it.

I don't watch a tremendous amount of TV (he says), but I get use out of it.

One big habit with TiVo is using the skip-back button to replay the previous five seconds if I missed what was said. Very helpful. No doubt annoying if ever I watched with someone.

However, I think it's having a negative impact on the rest of my life. Listening to sports radio while driving, I often want to hit the TiVo skipback button to replay something I missed. It takes a second to remmeber I can't do that with my radio, though I imagine that's not too far in the future.

At a conference, I wanted to skipback some of the lecturers! This might take longer to implement.

The point is, I wonder if TiVo fosters a laxity of focus. "I don't have to pay as much attention," says the subconscious, "I can replay something I just missed if it seemed interesting in the corner of my ear."

I'm not condoning adding TiVo to other non-TV parts of the world. Nor am I disparaging TiVo, I'm a huge fan (and stockholder). But I wonder if I'm experiencing indications of an adverse impact TiVo has on people's attention spans or focus in real life.

Years from now, you'll read articles about studies at big universities into this phenomenon. And I wont' get a dime, or even a citation for thinking of it first.

The Beholder's Other Eye

2005-05-11T16:09:00.000-07:00

I never wanted to start a blog. More often than not, they seem like online diaries with people exposing themselves in personal ways. I'm too private for that. So don't expect any substantive details of my personal life.

Yet I found a purpose to blogging for myself. Sometimes I have observations that don't fit right into a song, play, or one of my columns. What to do with it, aside from let it disappear in my fading memory? Blog it.

My regular column of Jewish-themed satire is called "The Beholder's Eye." This blog, in providing other pith outside of that theme, is therefore "The Beholder's Other Eye."